Last Friday marked the end of July (and Hallmark Channel’s Christmas in July), so I took in a final movie for the month and caught up on my entries into their sweepstakes to hopefully win a VIP trip to this year's Christmas Experience… or at least a Balsam Hill tree because I've always wanted one, but those suckers are wayyyy out of my budget. The movie was one of my favorites from the last half-decade - Five Star Christmas, starring Victor Webster and Bethany Joy Lenz, who to me is the true Queen of Christmas romance movies because of how she brings her characters to life (Sorry, Lacey Chabert). 

The premise of the movie is silly and what you’d expect from Hallmark: Lucy returns home for the holidays to find her father has turned their house into a struggling bed and breakfast. When an incognito travel critic arrives, the entire family pretends to be guests and staff to secure a glowing review. Meanwhile, Lucy falls for another guest named Jake, not knowing that he is the incognito travel critic.

Jake plays it off that he's a geologist to help justify why he's traveling solo over Christmas. And there's a scene where Lucy and Jake are alone by a fire at night (because of course they are!), and Lucy digs into his background a little during their playful banter. It goes something like this:

Lucy
What are you... What are you looking for on Long Hill?

Jake
Researching some iron deposits.

Lucy fakes excitement over how boring that sounds.

Jake
(continued)
You know what those are?

Lucy
(smiles)
Nope.

Jake
(chuckles)
Nope.
(pause)
It's, it's stardust.
(pause)
Yeah, iron is only created when giant stars explode. 
It's in everything. It's in mountains, trees, you, me.

Lucy
So we really are all made of stardust.

Jake
Yes, we are.

Lucy
(shouting to the heavens)
You hear that, mama? I'm a star.

Jake
You definitely are.

And, as I watched the scene unfold, I thought, “Dang, Hallmark. Giorgio Tsoukalos never taught me that on Ancient Aliens.”

And this one scene in a Hallmark movie caused three different thoughts to converge in my brain at once:

Thought #1

Is that true? I mean, it’s Hallmark, not Neil deGrasse Tyson teaching us about the cosmos. But it turns out it was pretty accurate. For those of you who are curious: Iron is the final element a star creates before it explodes. Inside the star, intense heat and gravity crush lighter elements into heavier ones (like iron). Once the star's core turns to iron, it loses its outward pressure, instantly collapses under its own gravity, and triggers a massive explosion. 

That’s the simple explanation from a non-scientist who did about 20 minutes of rabbit hole research, but the movie quote correctly highlights that this stellar iron is a fundamental building block of our world and that we are all made of exploded star dust, and therefore stars.

Thought #2

A feeling of happiness. Throughout life, I’ve had a tendency to compare myself to others and, 90% of the time, not in the best light. So, I don’t know, I guess it tickled my feel goods to have this thought that being made of stardust is something pretty special.

I know that I’m not alone here. There are studies that show that about 12 percent of our daily thoughts involve comparing ourselves to others. That’s a big number considering we have roughly 6,200 thoughts each day.

This comparison habit, explored through the Social Comparison Theory, hurts our happiness because our brains naturally lean heavily toward upward and lateral comparisons. Upward comparisons are when we find ourselves looking at people who have more success, wealth, or beauty than we do. This can occasionally work as a source of inspiration, but it often leads to sadness and feeling inadequate. Lateral comparisons are those where we’re sizing up the competition and how we match up with peers at the same level, which can often lead to stress over who is ahead. 

And there are decades of psychological research on this heavy lean toward comparing ourselves and how it sucks our happiness and leaves us with feelings of envy and lower self-esteem.

Thought #3

This one happened to one of those stupid lateral comparison: If we’re all made of stardust, why would I feel special? I mean, it’s clear that others got better stardust than me. Mine is maybe a little more like Fool's Gold.

But this is why a comparison here is irrelevant. It really doesn’t matter. We all catch ourselves looking up at the stars, taking in the enormity of the universe around us. Making wishes. Dreaming. Occasionally maybe catching a chain of Starlink satellites that we mistake as UFOs because we really want proof of what’s out there (or maybe that’s just me). 

Anyway, it’s really cool to know that we are made of stardust. So, while your brain will do what it does and find ways back to those unhelpful comparisons, never forget that you’re a star and that’s pretty freakin’ cool.

Here's your happytizer 🍟 for this week.

Go outside, look up at the sky, and remind yourself that you’re every bit as wonderful as the hot neon glitter bombs looking back at you.

That's Volume 071. Here's to Hallmark movies that accidentally teach us astrophysics, iron deposits that turn out to be stardust, and the quiet reminder that you are made of the same stuff as every star you've ever looked up at and wished on.

You hear that? You're a star.

Until next time: breathe deep, look up, and chill the duck out.

Jason

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Iron is the final element a massive star produces before it explodes in a supernova, with the resulting stellar material dispersed across the universe and incorporated into planets, living organisms, and human bodies. Research estimates that approximately 12% of daily thoughts involve social comparison, which across roughly 6,200 daily thoughts represents a significant portion of mental activity. Social Comparison Theory, developed by psychologist Leon Festinger, identifies upward comparisons with those perceived as more successful or attractive as a primary contributor to feelings of inadequacy and lower self esteem. Decades of psychological research confirm a consistent bias toward upward and lateral social comparisons over downward ones, with negative effects on happiness and wellbeing. Research on self compassion and perspective taking shows that zooming out to a larger frame of reference, whether philosophical, spiritual, or in this case astrophysical, reliably reduces the emotional impact of social comparison.